Losing someone to suicide can feel sudden, overwhelming, and impossible to understand. In sharing her story, Claudia reflects on love, loss, and the lifeline that Daisy’s Dream provided during her families darkest days. Their experience reminds us of the importance of support, understanding, and open conversations about mental health and grief.
We met through mutual friends and spent a lot of time together socially. He loved to go out and be around people we had a great social life. We were married for 10 years and I had three children, who were 15, 17 and 19 when he died, he was a fantastic husband and step father.
After lockdown, his drinking became increasingly out of control. He was battling demons he couldn’t overcome, although there were no signs that he would take his own life. It was completely sudden and utterly devastating. He was only 36, appeared healthy and fit, and was a regular gym-goer, all of this made the shock even harder to process.
In the early days, it was incredibly difficult because we didn’t even know at first that his death was a suicide. The uncertainty added another layer of pain to an already overwhelming loss. Each of the children was affected in different ways. Our eldest was at home when it happened and witnessed everything, which had a big impact.
Daisy’s Dream was a lifeline for us. They gave each of us the space and time to talk while we grieved, recognising that we were all at different stages – sadness, anger, confusion, and the constant question of why he didn’t ask for help. Being able to talk openly, without judgement, made such a difference. Sometimes it’s easier to speak to people you don’t know, and with Daisy’s Dream we felt able to be completely honest about our feelings.
He was a good husband and a wonderful father. Alcohol took hold in a way none of us could stop, and there was nothing the family could do. I don’t always tell people how he died because I don’t want him to be judged or defined by the way his life ended.
Now, I want to help others. I work at a funeral director’s, supporting families through their own losses. Moving on is never easy – this chapter of my life has closed, but trying to move forward can still feel frustrating and heavy at times. Even so, I hope that by sharing our story, I can help raise awareness of the vital support charities like Daisy’s Dream provide to families facing unimaginable grief. – Claudia.
A photo of Claudia and her husband Jay.
If you or someone you love is struggling with grief or thoughts of suicide, you are not alone. Please reach out, help is available, and no one has to face this alone.
